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she was someone that you could spend time with essentially.
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yeah. okay. i can't remember what... no, no. that's what i was going to say. so, i wanted to just-
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you wanting to-
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yeah. so, i think i'm mostly intent-
H
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Male
like, i'm gassing myself up. i'm really not, because i'm also very-
H
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it doesn't always work out as back and white as that.
A
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i think just the process specifically, i think some of the hearts behind it can be really-
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as much as i... the more and more i-
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to defend guys, sometimes guys are generally unsure. so-
O
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guys do make decisions after two weeks.
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i don't think it's always as simple as that. and i think as men-
O
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Female
then obviously men having to manage that. because i've talked about this quite a few times as well. i-
S
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feel like i am one of those people that definitely are like, when a guy knows, he knows, because very, very often-
H
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you'll find they're kind of after that to-
N
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Male
i think there is pressure for guys to-
S
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Male
[inaudible 00:07:01] definitely, i was saying this to my cousin the other day. i was like-
X
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to be fair, they both are like, "oh, so what's going on?"
H
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so, if you are not at that space where you're like, "oh, i don't know."
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Female
what you can do is drag on a relationship longer than it need-
S
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harder it can be longer term in terms of-
X
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Female
the onus is not just on the man in this-
S
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so, today, we are going to focus on something that we haven't necessarily talked about on the podcast, although it is mentioned-
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so, the survey that was done and this was-
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being in a relationship. and i think the survey-
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so, i kind of wants to get a male perspective on that because i know it's a very heated topic just generally.
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i thought we were saying, i think-
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i'm trying to think about how i'm going to word this. so, i think-
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i think the range of what we do deem to be physically attractive is a lot broader than we admit to.
N
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to be untrue. i think you are most likely-
N
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conditioned yourself to say, "oh, i only like this." so, i say that to say, not that people-
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other things that happen. i actually don't see why-
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why. i think a lot of the time, it might be, "oh, how it's presented to the world." i-
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isn't just how the person has presented themself-
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weight gain, or weight loss or whatever it is it is.
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it really doesn't. so, i feel like the heart of what is attracting you to that person has to be-
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even as single people, i really think about what-
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about this probably doesn't make sense, but it's not necessarily how it is to present it.
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and actually, i agree with pretty much everything that you said. and there's a couple of things that i kind of wants to just kind of delve into a bit further. so-
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think there is a difference between attraction and-
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so, you look at him as a light skinned. i met a guy who-
S
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but it was something that i was very attracted to. and when i first saw him-
H
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... why her? obviously because she plays sport.
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but for whatever reason, it's always stuck in my head and up until to this stage-
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and i'm sure other people would've been attracted to her, but again-
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but the second part i was going to go into a bit further is do you feel like-
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it's looking like i think... there's even a song that's by eric bellinger and it-
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one, people break away of those perceptions of-
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your scope because there's other things that need to be elevated.
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so, that's cool. as long as you've elevated what's important and you happen to meet someone that met your elite preference.
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what most people you'd find is that, when you elevate the important thing-
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no. there's probably... there are people that you would be attracted to.
U
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they'll get to know the person, so it doesn't fit. because, then i can speak to-
N
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... before, even when i'm really angry, they still remain-
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it's not... it wasn't there.
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... i thought, "yeah, this-
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... the preference, or because it doesn't fit in someone else's preference, which is-
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i remember being like, "give it time." she's so-
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... going to happen, that because of how much you value that person-
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... could, but it depends on how much you honor and you value that person. that's why i think-
H
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... itself is not a reason. i'm of the belief that, in a marriage, it does-
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... for example. or, for someone that doesn't believe in marriage or someone who is not for marriage, i would say-
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... fact that, "oh, i actually just don't care about how you view me anymore-
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... so i'm just going to do whatever i want." that speaks to a different issue-
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i think anyone can gain weight or lose weight.
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i don't think the heart behind that is helpful. that's not based on what they look like, specifically. that's more based on, "okay-
N
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i don't think that always looks like weight loss or weight gain-
N
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... to the podcast. what would you give to-
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... like we need what we need to get to the bottom of that. truly, thoroughly, holistically get-
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... to the bottom of all of those things. don't-
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... on instagram. i haven't quite set up my twitter yet, so you can-
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... studio today, i have not one, not two, not-
H
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i can't even know how many years, 29 from-
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yeah, pretty much. we're all pretty much around same year group in uni, because we met about-
H
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...straight into it. i'm going to go into the first part of the pod. this part is called-
H
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in terms of looks, i've always had a big thing for rihanna.
H
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she's got to be compassionate.
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cool. nice.aw.yeah. i feel like that any of the rockery-
H
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... job you'll do is essentially getting, you think, like-
S
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what's strange though, i was always thinking about doing it. once upon a time-
H
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... just to follow on from what you said, i think it does change. it does change as you get older and you realize that what you might see-
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that can turn into loyalty. that can turn into everything. do you know what i mean?
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... enough. okay, all right. moving on to the next-
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... and then moving on from that, i think-
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... going on from there, you have to-
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you have to see someone that you can-
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yeah. just someone loving and, you know-
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yeah. then all that everything everyone else-
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good teeth. can't deal with no snaggle teeth. i like a girl who's ambitious.
H
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... time.i'll see ya.cool. okay.
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i think you're coming on the stereotype there. i will go on the opposite.
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... like this girl, you don't have to [inaudible 00:03:38] it's an opinion.he'd have to give me valid reasons, though.it's an opinion-
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it's an opinion. because, there's a fact and there's an-
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there's the facts and there's opinions. the facts are whether this person is a good person or a bad person. if they do-
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their decision couldn't have been based upon any fact that-
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... connects. parents often do understand what-
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... you share with you. i tell my mom what she needs to know, no matter what. they even know what she needs to know, what she can handle.
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you know what i mean? i just can't imagine it. my mum is the most shadiest person on the planet, so you will know-
H
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... last point. the older i get on almost like a-
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that's why i handle stuff with a lot more care, even if i want to do that because i know that she's still got a certain viewpoint with certain things. i do know, okay-
N
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... experience. you know that's a man that's had, not just being with your mom, at the end of the day, mom-
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