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.. barely made it, through it, because it was just so depressing.
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and i did not want to put that into the world. i wanted to show women again that you can't, you can deal with this, but here's a healthy way.
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the thing is, i help women identify-
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... if you know that certain dates are coming up-
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... ahead of time. so when that day rolls around, it doesn't hit you as hard as it would in the past.
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action plan. now the thing is you have to do the work. cause as a coach, we can-
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... tools. but if you don't pick up the hammer and hit that nail on the head-
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also, although your clients, i think its-
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... in general, we're all digging to the same-
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... chronic illnesses. you're grieving who you thought you were going to be, your old-
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... out. the illness, the things that you thought you were going to be able to do that you might not then-
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oh gosh. i-
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... had one client say to me-
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... that, she said, "t, i could not understand why i just laid on the bed and just cried".
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that was a stage of life that you just had to release.
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... had her dig into why were these your favorite jeans?
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and i'm glad that you said that grief is not just death. grief is-
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... if you're losing a job or transitioning to a new job or changing your hairstyle, you can grieve what you look like.
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...so, we're in the middle, like 2020.
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we are in the middle of a grief.
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... life is the same. i'm definitely grieving. not being able to hop on a plane and go travel.
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so it's just-
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and it's rude because it doesn't care where you are, who-
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... because the memory of my mother dancing to that song hit me like a brick upside, my head. and i had to pull over and allow myself to-
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... fact that yes, we are grieving and it's okay to grieve.
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... cry. it's okay to scream. it's okay to grieve that-
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just because you still have those moments does not mean you are not still living an amazing life.
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take advantage of those opportunities. when this happens, i can handle this.
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... cause i'm ready and things like that. and i think also people like you and people-
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... like me during this global panorama are, in a good space because-
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... lot of people who've had covid and whose symptoms have persisted. yes-
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... and you have to grieve what could have been. or-
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... need. and i think that's an important juxtaposition.
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that is a kind of good transition to you living your empowered life-
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ooh, honey. that empowered life means to me that i may know-
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all apologies for laughing and living life and going out here and getting it. nobody can stop-
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i'm not a hundred percent dependent on it. i can go off of it for a time, but not for forever.
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so if you're sitting there talking to somebody and they're giving you the side eye, baby, ho-
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because a part of me... i've always been a woman of faith. so a part of me knew that-
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i did not want to hear nothing about, "oh, be encouraged, be of good cheer." people are like-
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don't have it. just let me cry. if i want to cry right now, let me cry.
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-scream just because it is making you uncomfortable. then you go into another-
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people trying to force food down my throat, because i wasn't eating. first of all, you didn't see me-
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that's not even what they need.
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and then you wonder why people are like... you're getting offended because they're not accepting what you're giving.
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it's something i had to deal with because sometimes it makes you feel like... am i mad at-
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i'd be so tired of hearing about, "can i pray for you?" sometimes i feel like, "yeah, you can pray for me, girl. i'll take all the prayers you can give. but sometimes i don't know where your prayers coming from."
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and then, the other part of that is like...
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you telling me that god is going to heal me?
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i believe that god is a healer.
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i can't plan for the future healing that he ain't even told me about and not living today. i have to do the work with what he has-
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...given me today. and if tomorrow he decides i'm healed, i can adjust to there. but...
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listen. i was definitely, wholeheartedly, angry.
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i was like one of them super, super, super-fi christians, right?
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i was very angry. and nobody could answer those questions.
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literally stop praying. and i was like, "i'm mad at you."
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but people, in christianese...
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they're like, "don't question god. and don't be angry with him."
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abraham, all them jokers. if you look at the book of lamentations...
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the whole book of lamentations is god, why-
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why me lord? why you doing this?
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really transformed when i accepted the fact. and i said that-
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my very first prayer, when i finally was like, "i'm going to talk to god about this. my very-"
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... that was my prayer. i am mad at you. i don't-
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understand. why did you allow this to happen?
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it was like he was waiting on me to do that.
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he was waiting on me to admit, this is what you're feeling. and this is what you feel towards me. now let me-
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you say that god is all powerful and all knowing and-
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why do we feel sometimes that he doesn't know how we're feeling? why we trying to lie to god?
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going back to you said you wasn't wishing nobody else to lose a child, but you losing 100%-
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five... them losing one, which is 20% would-
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to be able to transform and continue-
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people kind of dismiss what you're going through. he don't give you more than you can bear. be like-
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i'm here and i'm not okay.
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i know that he's with me. and eventually i'm going to find my way back to him.
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as well, i'm trying to get her to start the second one-
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yeah. so y'all definitely make sure y'all check out the charging station to get you a good kee-
H
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kind of having discussions and talking does help to some degree. so, i-
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i appreciate you joining me today to talk about how you're living your amazing-
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e-t-r-a-c-e-y. empowers, e-m-p-
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list there. make sure you get on there because we're going to we're going to stop-
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this grief. we're going to disrupt the cycle of grief and show people that you can live. and-
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with grief. you deal with grief. grief doesn't deal with you.
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he said that. y'all over here saying all the things. yes.
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well, thank you so much for joining us today.anytime, anytime.tracy-
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absolutely. hello, everyone. my name is wesley weston. my-
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the podcast, so as i've probably-
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mentioned on social media, i'm going to be bringing in a good amount of my friends onto-
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do you remember how we met?
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people will consider a 9-5 is... i am an attorney by trade...
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and then from there i bounced around.
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i'm one of those rare situations where your professional career really-
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starts in the nation's capital for my-
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profession, most people end up there. you either work in local and state government and try to work your way up. and in your thirties and forties, you end up-
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i started as an unpaid intern for a former senator.
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me, i drew a picture of a man in a long black robe. and my teacher was like, "what is this?"
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she sent a letter home to my mother and was like, "do you have...?"
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attorneys or judges or anything like that in your family? how would-
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i feel like the minority communities are very uneducated and unaware of their other legal rights.
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of the law, what you can and cannot do, and things like that. and that is initially why i went into law because i have a desire to-
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