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and the other one it's because, you know, i came out to my mother and she just saw that us,
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that was going to be a huge thing in some, there are some places where you cannot be different, like gay
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or. of songs and singing for up to 13 hours at a time, she calls it training herself to be a live jukebox
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that strong, they respected that. and they treat that like a queen [inaudible]
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said, vasquez sang two of her solo songs.
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the book started on a cell phone. the voice that i wrote first was his nana's voice.
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and so that was written on my little, my little cell phone, my mobile phone. and at first the run was
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african american that lasted for about a week because i couldn't quite get the story to work around that idea. and also it was
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going to become another tale of racial becoming that i felt would be too close to my first novel. and when i decided that it
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would make more sense for him to be white, then the story opened up. so that was probably one of the most critical,
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well,first of all, i was thinking of a good bit about one new media artist in particular, mark tribe, up at brown who had tried to recreate some civil
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rights era speeches and he recorded them and then projected these images inside
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in a new media class. this project came up and while it was being discussed, the class broke into two camps.
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one group thought that he was being ironic, that he was in no way being serious. the other half thought that he was
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sincere. and what i found very interesting was this split. and it got me thinking more so about how we make sense of
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what's sincere and what's not, and what's real and what's not, and how we handle irony. and then for quite some time, i'd also had in mind, this question
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of, what would happen if you expanded the diversity of the cast of characters at a civil war reenactment,
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i definitely wanted it to sound like its own world so that you felt like you were in a real place.
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also, it needed to sound so different from berkeley as well. in berkeley, most of the activity takes place on the campus.
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so the academic dictionary basically is sort of the farm for that language in brecksville, the demands were a little bit different things actually had to be
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marquesha babers is a working poet based out of los angeles. these days she's using her writing to help other teams find their own voices
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this weekend, she is also in bend for the muse women's conference. we caught up with her before the conference kicked off. marquesha babers, welcome to state of wonder,
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will you tell us a little bit about where you grew up in watts?
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yeah, well, i grew up in a really bad part of watts. i've actually moved around so much during my childhood.
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like i was never stable, but everywhere i went, it seemed to always be the worst part of the neighborhood. you know
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how old were you when you started writing your own poems? i was nine years old when i started writing my own poems. i had went through something
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and i said, i had really nobody to talk to at the time. it was a really hard situation for me and i didn't know what else to do. so
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i started just writing about it. i just continued to write about it and write about it and write about it.
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you know, it's obvious that you were going through difficult times with, having to take care of your brothers and your mom's working and moving around a lot. sometimes being in between places.
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i'm not trying to crack you open like a can opener, but can you tell us anything about what was going on that needed to work its way to the surface?
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we were homeless. we had been homeless for about seven years, and
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i had a bad experience with a guy. and i couldn't tell my mom about it because
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they were close. so i was afraid to tell my mom, and i couldn't talk to my brothers because i didn't think they would understand what had happened.
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so i was just... i had it just bottled up inside of me, and i didn't know who to turn to, who to talk to,
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or i didn't have a friend that could keep a secret.
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so that's what was
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really my main focus at that time, was i needed to tell somebody, and the paper was the only person i could talk to. right.
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well, will you share with us a little bit about how did you start reading your poems to other people?
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the first time i read a poem out loud to an audience was at church. my mom, she had found one of my books that i write in,
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and she read the poem herself. and she decided that she thought it would be, i guess, good therapy for me to
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perform it for the church, and get some help with what i was going through. and so she made me get up in front of the church. so i did.
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how has your poetry changed as you've started to read it to people?
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it went from, during that very sad time in my life, from being very sad-oriented poetry
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to more uplifting, like, i've been there, and i'm here to help you, type poetry.
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will you read for us?
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sure. this poem is called girl, and it's one of my newest poems.
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people only see me as that girl. that fat girl, just a little too black girl, always sitting in the back girl, that girl.
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people tell me you're weak girl. no one wants to hear you speak, girl. look at me, i'm not at your feet girl, stop crying, girl. it's not like you're dying, girl. no one will like you
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for who you are, and your career definitely won't go far. not with that hair, those clothes, those shoes, you really need to change
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all of you, girl. sometimes i tell myself, "you know depression ain't cute, girl. and you just stop waiting and do what you have to do, girl.
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i mean, if you're going to end it, then do it already, girl. just make sure you keep your hand steady girl. you want to get it right girl, just wait til night girl then get the knife girl.
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it only takes one slice girl." look at you, too weak to take your own life girl. but god told me, "aren't you tired of waiting to die, girl?.
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all you have to do is try, girl. i gave you your life to live, girl. i gave your gift to give, girl. i am always here, girl. it's okay to shed a tear,
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girl. just don't fear girl, because you are that girl, made strong enough to carry the world on your back girl. so stand up straight
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girl. you will be great girl. it is your fate girl. don't worry about the past girl. remember who was first shall be last. so you've been through the worst
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girl. now it's your time to be first girl." then god held out his hands. he said, "take this, girl. don't waste it, girl. you'll know when
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to use it, girl. it's a miracle, girl. like you, you are a miracle ,girl."
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wow. thank you. would you tell me about the pivot in that poem? the point at which it turns from the negative voices
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in one's head, to messages of support and voices saying, "yes, you can do this."
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i didn't want it to just be a negative poem, just to end on a negative note. i wanted to show that there is
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a possibility to overcome. you are worthy of... that you are special. you are beautiful no matter what anyone says.
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like, god created you, and only god can judge you. not even you can judge you like god can judge you. and that was the point of the poem.
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marquesha babers. i want to thank you very much for taking some time to talk to us, and we're looking forward to seeing you in bend this weekend.
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no problem, and thank you so much.
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marquesha babers gave a speech at the muse women's conference in bend just this morning. you can catch her tomorrow at 1:00 pm at the conference for a workshop.
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huge black and white photographs line the walls of upfor gallery in portland this month. the images look pretty abstract at first,
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black backgrounds with irregular white shapes clustered across them. step a little closer, and you see these are little tableaus
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made by the visual artist, rodrigo valenzuela, and they've got quite a bit of detail. they capture structures he made for a show on view right now at seattle's frye museum, hedonic reversals.
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the white shapes definitely suggest buildings, but the forms are so rough-edged. are they under construction, or in a state of decay? we asked rodrigo valenzuela.
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they're like in this in between point, and they are open for interpretation for what the viewer wants it to be. some people look at them as a demolition. some other people-
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are these all images of works you developed for hedonic reversal?
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yeah. and then you hedonic reversal is a large installation i built at the frye art museum. and to
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figure out the way that we look at ruins, so the aesthetic of ruins, without taking advantage of the pain that ruins have
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implicit in them. i didn't want to go and document ruins in detroit, for example, because i don't think it's fair for people that live in
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detroit [coming] this guy out of town, overstate the size in their pain. it is a social issue.
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i don't want to read too much into the places you've been living and working, but you have been in seattle and houston, two cities that have experienced explosive
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growth over the past two decades. was looking around those places very informative for what you've been working on?
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yeah, definitely both have... mostly seattle have big impact on this idea of the ruin, mostly in places that
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have a very recent history, or not a very large past. you know, traveling around south america to peru, and
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i travel around mexico, costa rica, [inaudible 00:06:39], i have gone through most of central america by bus, by ground. so i have seen how people
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understand that past. the ruins are there, and the ruins are present within a cosmopolitan city, or it's a source of knowledge of understanding themselves in the present.
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usa doesn't have too much of that, you know? the past, or the ruins, they just meaning economic collapse.
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tell us a little bit about your process for the images that are on view here now.
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i was thinking about the subject of the ruin. i mean, making these plaster molds and little tiny figures, like very solid, simple,
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plaster shapes, that i paint white. so they are very, very monochromatic structures that they aim to resemble a structure,
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or like a miniature. i photographed that. i go to the dark room, develop the film. i
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scan the film. i print it very large, to like human-size, like eight-by-eight feet. so this [inaudible] is structure with all the details and all the problems
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that they have in this miniature. slowly, they become the focal point, or the difference of texture, or the difference of
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quality, and all the difference in scale. they become very present when you have them in eight-by-eight feet. and then i paint two-by-fours,
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and i make it these big plastered shapes that i place against a wall. and then i rephotograph that, the images
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echoing themselves, and the [generated] time you can see the past, and you can see that they will have a future. if i keep playing this game or just [rephotograph]
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in every photo. among the many little jokes that valenzuela builds into his tableaus are price tags left on some of the pieces of wood that make up his towers, pieces of blackboard chalk
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with just the right [force] perspective to make you think they're spare marble columns. on some, his own ghostly footprint is left in powdery
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white dust. it's impossible to tell looking at these whether as ruins, they were something
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wonderful and graceful, or something functional.
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but we have that relationship with all the ruins. you know, when you may go to rome, and be very amazed for this room,
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and the beauty of the room, only the feelings that you get in the room. and if you do a little research, maybe the public bathroom from the roman... you think that this
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place have a bigger signifier than what they are. we are surrounded by like, banalities, and like, things that make our life, and make our culture.
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they're very simple. like phone cord, and like plastic will remain longer than any of these things. that is what other generation will know us for.
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rodrigo valenzuela. his exhibition, hedonistic reversal, is on view at the frye museum in seattle and at upfor gallery in portland.
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