Patent of Running

country: Sumer (Mesopotamia)

description: A patent granted to the inventor Runnerious for the discovery of a new form of human locomotion in which both feet leave the ground simultaneously, called Running. The patent defines the invention, sets licensing requirements and fees for different social classes, establishes penalties for unlicensed running, and states that the words 'run' and 'running' derive from the inventor's name.


Patent of the Vertical Thumb Swipe

country: United States

description: A patent granted to inventor Swipeon Glassford for the discovery of a repetitive upward thumb motion on a handheld glass screen, enabling the rapid viewing of sequential digital content, termed Scrolling. The patent claims exclusive rights over any thumb movement exceeding two swipes per minute, requires licensing for commercial use of the motion in applications, and notes that the word 'scroll' predates the invention but must now be understood in this context only.

date_of_publication: March 2025

date_of_registration: March 2025


name: Patent of the Double Tap Approval Gesture

country: United Kingdom

description: A patent granted to inventor Heartrick Finch for the discovery that tapping a glass screen twice in rapid succession can express approval of visual content without the use of words, termed Liking. The patent defines a minimum and maximum interval between taps to qualify as a valid Like, establishes a licensing fee per platform, and forbids unlicensed double-tapping performed with intent to approve.

date_of_publication: June 2025

date_of_registration: July 2025


name: Patent of the Involuntary Deep Exhale of Exhaustion

country: Canada

description: A patent granted to inventor Sighmon Wexley for the discovery of a prolonged audible exhalation performed when a human experiences mild frustration, termed Sighing. The patent distinguishes Sighing from ordinary breathing by duration and audible tone, requires a license for public or workplace use, and imposes a fine on those who sigh in the presence of a supervisor without prior authorization.

date_of_publication: September 2025

date_of_registration: October 2025


name: Patent of the Seated Leg-Crossed Floor Position

country: India

description: A patent granted to inventor Padma Sitwell for the discovery of a stable seated posture achieved by folding both legs inward on a flat surface, termed Sitting Cross-Legged. The patent claims all instances of this posture performed for meditation, dining, or casual rest, requires licensing for yoga studios and classrooms, and exempts infants under the age of two on developmental grounds.

date_of_publication: January 2026

date_of_registration: February 2026


name: Patent of the Unconscious Melodic Vocalization During Labor

country: Ireland

description: A patent granted to inventor Tuneford Hollis for the discovery that a human may produce a wordless melodic sound while performing repetitive manual tasks, termed Humming. The patent covers all pitched vocalizations lacking lyrical content, requires a license for humming performed in shared workspaces, and permits an exemption for humming performed entirely alone with no possible listener.

date_of_publication: April 2026


name: Patent of the Rapid Ocular Shutter Sequence of Confusion

country: Ghana

description: A patent granted to inventor Blinkard Osei for the discovery of an accelerated blinking pattern occurring when a human encounters information it does not understand, termed Confused Blinking. The patent distinguishes this from ordinary blinking by frequency and furrowed-brow correlation, requires licensing for use in classrooms and boardrooms, and provides a defense for those who can prove the blinking was caused by dust.

date_of_registration: June 2026


name: Patent of the Raised Open Palm Greeting Gesture

country: Australia

description: A patent granted to inventor Handra Wolcombe for the discovery of a raised open hand moved side to side as a greeting performed at a distance too great for speech, termed Waving. The patent claims all waves exceeding one full arc of the wrist, requires licensing for use at airports and public reunions, and imposes a reduced fee for waves performed with only four fingers.

date_of_publication: August 2025

date_of_registration: September 2025


name: Patent of the Involuntary Wide Mouth Opening During Fatigue

country: France

description: A patent granted to inventor Yawnric Delacroix for the discovery of an involuntary wide opening of the mouth accompanied by a deep inhale, occurring when a human experiences tiredness or boredom, termed Yawning. The patent requires a hand covering to accompany all licensed yawns performed in public, sets a fine for uncovered yawning within one meter of another person, and denies any claim that yawning is contagious without a certified witness.

date_of_publication: November 2025

date_of_registration: December 2025


name: Patent of the Single-Leg Standing Wait Posture

country: Italy

description: A patent granted to inventor Flaminia Roost for the discovery of a resting stance in which a human balances on one leg while the other is bent and tucked, typically performed while waiting in a queue, termed The Flamingo Stance. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than ten seconds, requires licensing for use at transit stations, and grants an automatic exemption to anyone who insists they are merely stretching.

date_of_publication: February 2026

date_of_registration: March 2026


name: Patent of the Reduced Volume Vocal Communication Technique

country: New Zealand

description: A patent granted to inventor Hushford Callan for the discovery of speech produced at a volume too low for anyone beyond the intended listener to hear, termed Whispering. The patent claims all vocalizations below a defined decibel threshold performed with intent to exclude a third party, requires licensing for use in libraries, classrooms, and shared offices, and imposes a doubled fine when the whispering concerns the person standing nearby.

date_of_publication: July 2026

date_of_registration: July 2026


name: Patent of the Rhythmic Foot Contact Motion

country: Brazil

description: A patent granted to inventor Rhythmo Alves for the discovery of a repeated tapping of the foot against the ground in time with an audible rhythm, termed Foot Tapping. The patent claims all instances performed in response to music, requires licensing for use in offices during meetings, and provides a defense for those who can prove the rhythm was involuntary.

date_of_publication: January 2025

date_of_registration: February 2025


name: Patent of the Manual Joint Release Technique

country: Germany

description: A patent granted to inventor Knuckleton Braun for the discovery of a deliberate manipulation of finger joints producing an audible popping sound, termed Knuckle Cracking. The patent claims all instances performed within earshot of another person, requires licensing for use in shared offices, and imposes a heavier fine for cracking performed during a meeting.

date_of_publication: February 2025


name: Patent of the Upward Ocular Rotation of Disbelief

country: Spain

description: A patent granted to inventor Ojos Fernandez for the discovery of an upward rotation of both eyes performed to express disbelief or mild contempt without speech, termed Eye Rolling. The patent claims all rotations exceeding a defined angle, requires licensing for use in classrooms and family gatherings, and denies any exemption for rolling performed behind a person's back.

date_of_publication: April 2025


name: Patent of the Bilateral Shoulder Elevation of Indifference

country: Sweden

description: A patent granted to inventor Shrugard Lindqvist for the discovery of a simultaneous raising of both shoulders performed to express uncertainty or indifference, termed Shrugging. The patent claims all instances lasting more than one second, requires licensing for use in workplace correspondence when performed on video calls, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove they genuinely did not know the answer.


name: Patent of the Extended Index Digit Directional Signal

country: Nigeria

description: A patent granted to inventor Fingero Adeyemi for the discovery of an extended index finger used to indicate direction or object without speech, termed Pointing. The patent claims all instances directed at a person rather than an object, requires licensing for use in classrooms and courtrooms, and imposes a fine for pointing performed during an argument.


name: Patent of the Preparatory Vocal Cord Adjustment

country: Japan

description: A patent granted to inventor Ahem Tanaka for the discovery of a brief vocalized clearing of the throat performed immediately before speech to gain attention, termed Throat Clearing. The patent claims all instances performed in meetings or classrooms, requires licensing for use before formal announcements, and denies any claim that the clearing was medically necessary without documentation.


name: Patent of the Lateral Cranial Inclination of Attention

country: Poland

description: A patent granted to inventor Tiltrose Kowalski for the discovery of a sideways tilting of the head performed while listening intently to another person, termed Head Tilting. The patent claims all inclinations exceeding fifteen degrees, requires licensing for use in therapy sessions and interviews, and grants an exemption to dogs, who are believed to have performed this motion first without registering it.

date_of_publication: October 2025

date_of_registration: November 2025


name: Patent of the Repetitive Digital Table Percussion

country: Scotland

description: A patent granted to inventor Drumfield Reid for the discovery of a rhythmic tapping of the fingers against a flat surface performed during periods of impatience, termed Finger Drumming. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than five seconds, requires licensing for use in waiting rooms, and imposes an increased fine for drumming performed near a sleeping person.


name: Patent of the Unilateral Brow Elevation of Skepticism

country: Kenya

description: A patent granted to inventor Browford Mwangi for the discovery of the raising of a single eyebrow performed to express doubt or suspicion without speech, termed Eyebrow Raising. The patent claims all instances directed at a specific claim or person, requires licensing for use in negotiations, and denies any defense based on natural facial asymmetry without a medical certificate.

date_of_publication: December 2025

date_of_registration: January 2026


name: Patent of the Concealed Oral Cavity Amusement Response

country: South Korea

description: A patent granted to inventor Gigglemura Park for the discovery of a hand placed over the mouth while laughing, performed to suppress or soften the sound of amusement, termed Mouth-Covered Laughing. The patent claims all instances performed in formal settings, requires licensing for use in classrooms, and grants an exemption to anyone laughing at their own joke.


name: Patent of the Bimanual Frictional Warming Technique

country: Norway

description: A patent granted to inventor Chillsen Nordqvist for the discovery of the rubbing together of both palms to generate warmth in cold conditions, termed Hand Rubbing. The patent claims all instances performed outdoors below a defined temperature, requires licensing for use at bus stops, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove the motion was performed out of anticipation rather than cold.


name: Patent of the Percussive Digit Memory Trigger

country: Mexico

description: A patent granted to inventor Snapford Reyes for the discovery of a snapping motion of the thumb and middle finger performed at the moment a forgotten thought is suddenly recalled, termed Finger Snapping. The patent claims all instances accompanied by an exclamation, requires licensing for use in classrooms, and imposes a fine for snapping performed to summon another person's attention.

date_of_publication: March 2026

date_of_registration: April 2026


name: Patent of the Bilateral Arm Barrier Formation

country: Argentina

description: A patent granted to inventor Armando Castellano for the discovery of the folding of both arms across the chest performed as a defensive or guarded posture during conversation, termed Arm Crossing. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than ten seconds during a disagreement, requires licensing for use in negotiations, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove they were merely cold.


name: Patent of the Repetitive Keratin Edge Removal Habit

country: Philippines

description: A patent granted to inventor Nailin Cruz for the discovery of the habitual biting of one's own fingernails performed during states of nervousness or concentration, termed Nail Biting. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than three seconds, requires licensing for use during examinations, and denies any defense based on claims of hunger.


name: Patent of the Post-Slumber Bilateral Limb Extension

country: Russia

description: A patent granted to inventor Stretchov Petrov for the discovery of the extension of both arms overhead immediately upon waking, accompanied by an involuntary sound, termed Morning Stretching. The patent claims all instances performed within one minute of waking, requires licensing for use in shared households, and grants an exemption to anyone stretching in complete privacy.


name: Patent of the Reduced Impact Forefoot Walking Method

description: A patent granted to inventor Tipton MacLeod for the discovery of a quiet walking technique performed on the toes to avoid producing sound, termed Tiptoeing. The patent claims all instances performed near a sleeping person, requires licensing for use in households with infants, and imposes a fine for tiptoeing performed with the intent to surprise another person.

date_of_publication: July 2025

date_of_registration: August 2025


name: Patent of the Vertical Cranial Affirmation Motion

country: Portugal

description: A patent granted to inventor Noddington Silva for the discovery of a repeated downward and upward motion of the head performed to signal agreement, termed Nodding. The patent claims all instances performed during a spoken agreement, requires licensing for use in business meetings, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove the motion was caused by drowsiness.


name: Patent of the Lateral Cranial Negation Motion

country: Turkey

description: A patent granted to inventor Shakeford Demir for the discovery of a repeated side-to-side motion of the head performed to signal disagreement, termed Head Shaking. The patent claims all instances performed during a verbal refusal, requires licensing for use in classrooms and courtrooms, and denies any defense based on claims of an itch.


name: Patent of the Unilateral Ocular Closure Signal

country: Taiwan

description: A patent granted to inventor Winkler Huang for the discovery of the brief closing of a single eye performed to signal shared understanding or mischief, termed Winking. The patent claims all instances directed at a specific individual, requires licensing for use in professional settings, and imposes a fine for winking performed during a formal negotiation.


name: Patent of the Bilateral Lip Compression of Deliberation

country: Belgium

description: A patent granted to inventor Pursemont Van Damme for the discovery of the pressing together of both lips performed while considering a difficult decision, termed Pursing Lips. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than two seconds, requires licensing for use during negotiations, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove the expression was caused by a sour taste.


name: Patent of the Single Digit Screen Activation Method

country: China

description: A patent granted to inventor Wakefield Chen for the discovery of a brief tap on a darkened glass screen performed to restore its illumination, termed Tap-to-Wake. The patent claims all instances performed with a single finger, requires licensing for use across all handheld devices, and denies any defense based on claims of accidental contact.


name: Patent of the Leftward Digital Rejection Gesture

country: Denmark

description: A patent granted to inventor Leftrick Johansson for the discovery of a leftward swipe of the finger across a screen performed to indicate rejection of a presented option, termed Swiping Left. The patent claims all instances performed on matchmaking or selection applications, requires licensing per platform, and grants no exemption for swipes performed by accident.


name: Patent of the Rightward Digital Acceptance Gesture

country: Austria

description: A patent granted to inventor Rightley Muller for the discovery of a rightward swipe of the finger across a screen performed to indicate acceptance of a presented option, termed Swiping Right. The patent claims all instances performed on matchmaking or selection applications, requires licensing per platform, and imposes a doubled fee for swipes performed impulsively.


name: Patent of the Bidigital Convergent Screen Manipulation

country: Switzerland

description: A patent granted to inventor Pinchford Meier for the discovery of the drawing together of two fingers on a glass screen performed to reduce the size of displayed content, termed Pinch to Zoom. The patent claims all instances performed on handheld devices, requires licensing for use in applications displaying maps or photographs, and grants no exemption for the reverse motion, which remains separately licensed.


name: Patent of the Voluntary Suspension of Respiration Underwater

country: Singapore

description: A patent granted to inventor Breathless Ng for the discovery of the deliberate holding of one's breath while the body is submerged in water, termed Breath Holding. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than five seconds, requires licensing for use in public swimming facilities, and grants an exemption to anyone who can prove the submersion was accidental.


name: Patent of the Oral Airflow Melodic Production Technique

country: Uganda

description: A patent granted to inventor Whistleton Okello for the discovery of the production of a musical tone by forcing air through pursed lips, termed Whistling. The patent claims all instances performed in public spaces, requires licensing for use while walking, and imposes an increased fine for whistling performed in enclosed elevators.


name: Patent of the Bimanual Percussive Approval Signal

country: Greece

description: A patent granted to inventor Clapford Dimitriou for the discovery of the repeated striking together of both palms performed to express approval following a performance, termed Clapping. The patent claims all instances lasting longer than three seconds, requires licensing for use in theaters and stadiums, and denies any exemption for clapping performed sarcastically.

date_of_publication: June 2026


name: Patent of the Knuckle-to-Knuckle Greeting Contact

country: Iran

description: A patent granted to inventor Bumpton Alavi for the discovery of a brief contact between the closed fists of two individuals performed as a greeting or gesture of agreement, termed Fist Bumping. The patent claims all instances performed in place of a handshake, requires licensing for use in workplaces, and imposes a fine for fist bumps performed with excessive force.


name: Patent of the Elevated Palm Contact Celebration Gesture

country: Vietnam

description: A patent granted to inventor Fivestone Nguyen for the discovery of a raised-hand palm slap performed between two individuals to celebrate a shared success, termed the High Five. The patent claims all instances performed above shoulder height, requires licensing for use in sporting events, and denies any defense based on a missed or failed attempt.


name: Patent of the Bidigital Emphasis Gesture

country: Iceland

description: A patent granted to inventor Quoteworth Jonsson for the discovery of the raising of both hands with index and middle fingers bent to indicate sarcasm or a direct quotation, termed Air Quotes. The patent claims all instances performed during spoken conversation, requires licensing for use in professional presentations, and imposes a doubled fine when the gesture is directed at a supervisor's own words.