| import Head from "next/head"; |
| import { useAmp } from "next/amp"; |
| import Layout from "../components/Layout"; |
| import Byline from "../components/Byline"; |
|
|
| export const config = { |
| amp: true, |
| }; |
|
|
| export default function IndexPage() { |
| const isAmp = useAmp(); |
|
|
| return ( |
| <Layout> |
| <Head> |
| <title>The Cat</title> |
| </Head> |
| <h1>The Cat (AMP-first Page)</h1> |
| <Byline author="Dan Zajdband" /> |
| <p className="caption">Meowwwwwwww</p> |
| <amp-img |
| alt="Mountains" |
| width="550" |
| height="368" |
| layout="responsive" |
| src="https://amp.dev/static/inline-examples/images/mountains.webp" |
| > |
| <amp-img |
| alt="Mountains" |
| fallback="" |
| width="550" |
| height="368" |
| layout="responsive" |
| src="https://amp.dev/static/inline-examples/images/mountains.jpg" |
| ></amp-img> |
| </amp-img> |
| <p> |
| Cat ipsum dolor <a href={isAmp ? "/dog?amp=1" : "/dog"}>sit amet</a>, |
| eat grass, throw it back up but refuse to leave cardboard box or groom |
| yourself 4 hours - checked, have your beauty sleep 18 hours - checked, |
| be fabulous for the rest of the day - checked!. Hide from vacuum |
| cleaner. Chirp at birds chew foot chase the pig around the house and |
| meoooow!. Chase ball of string climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to |
| fireman then scratch his face claw drapes, for meow to be let in yet |
| attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim meow loudly just to annoy |
| owners. Touch water with paw then recoil in horror hide when guests come |
| over, and tuxedo cats always looking dapper so has closed eyes but still |
| sees you or a nice warm laptop for me to sit on pee in human's bed until |
| he cleans the litter box. Steal the warm chair right after you get up |
| cat not kitten around yet claws in your leg eat all the power cords. |
| Lick sellotape curl into a furry donut immediately regret falling into |
| bathtub or you call this cat food? and fall asleep on the washing |
| machine. Purr for no reason hack up furballs and pelt around the house |
| and up and down stairs chasing phantoms. If it smells like fish eat as |
| much as you wish. Unwrap toilet paper chew iPad power cord white cat |
| sleeps on a black shirt lick the other cats. Lounge in doorway mew. Has |
| closed eyes but still sees you sleep on keyboard, so hunt anything that |
| moves lick sellotape but slap owner's face at 5am until human fills food |
| dish if it smells like fish eat as much as you wish. Meow to be let in |
| find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day and thug cat sit by the |
| fire burrow under covers always hungry. Swat at dog hide when guests |
| come over purrrrrr chew on cable so mark territory, yet howl on top of |
| tall thing or find something else more interesting. Chase mice kitten is |
| playing with dead mouse. Sit and stare if it fits, i sits. Mark |
| territory damn that dog , but step on your keyboard while you're gaming |
| and then turn in a circle put butt in owner's face human give me |
| attention meow or eat and than sleep on your face. Friends are not food |
| jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, or walk on car |
| leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield, and spread kitty |
| litter all over house, going to catch the red dot today going to catch |
| the red dot today. Jump off balcony, onto stranger's head. |
| </p> |
| <p> |
| Meow to be let out damn that dog howl uncontrollably for no reason |
| caticus cuteicus for play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard. Meow |
| loudly just to annoy owners the dog smells bad for eat the fat cats |
| food, yet ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway cat |
| snacks spread kitty litter all over house or hopped up on catnip. Spit |
| up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum throwup on your |
| pillow, so cat is love, cat is life yet human is washing you why help oh |
| the horror flee scratch hiss bite. Chase mice. Swat turds around the |
| house hide at bottom of staircase to trip human. Meowing non stop for |
| food howl on top of tall thing. Shake treat bag pee in human's bed until |
| he cleans the litter box missing until dinner time. Have secret plans |
| climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to fireman then scratch his face |
| bleghbleghvomit my furball really tie the room together. Chase dog then |
| run away purr shake treat bag spit up on light gray carpet instead of |
| adjacent linoleum but dream about hunting birds. Hiss at vacuum cleaner |
| milk the cow lay on arms while you're using the keyboard sleep in the |
| bathroom sink. Stare at ceiling touch water with paw then recoil in |
| horror or refuse to leave cardboard box. Paw at your fat belly plan |
| steps for world domination for going to catch the red dot today going to |
| catch the red dot today slap owner's face at 5am until human fills food |
| dish scratch at the door then walk away for intrigued by the shower, but |
| steal the warm chair right after you get up. Fall asleep on the washing |
| machine destroy couch as revenge scream at the bath so love to play with |
| owner's hair tie. Howl uncontrollably for no reason rub whiskers on bare |
| skin act innocent. Cats making all the muffins lick butt and make a |
| weird face meow all night having their mate disturbing sleeping humans |
| human give me attention meow intently stare at the same spot. Sleep on |
| dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor spot something, big eyes, big eyes, |
| crouch, shake butt, prepare to pounce for wake up human for food at 4am |
| or pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space |
| sleep on keyboard put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at |
| full speed . Jump off balcony, onto stranger's head lick butt and make a |
| weird face but go into a room to decide you didn't want to be in there |
| anyway so then cats take over the world, pee in human's bed until he |
| cleans the litter box and if it fits, i sits caticus cuteicus. Eats |
| owners hair then claws head lounge in doorway, and hide when guests come |
| over chase ball of string eat owner's food play riveting piece on |
| synthesizer keyboard. Purrr purr little cat, little cat purr purr spit |
| up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum kitty loves pigs |
| yet damn that dog meow or walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on |
| hood and windshield. Roll on the floor purring your whiskers off meow |
| all night having their mate disturbing sleeping humans need to chase |
| tail meow hide when guests come over. Soft kitty warm kitty little ball |
| of furr destroy the blinds meow leave hair everywhere attack dog, run |
| away and pretend to be victim. Going to catch the red dot today going to |
| catch the red dot today instantly break out into full speed gallop |
| across the house for no reason meow so hide when guests come over, yet |
| hide at bottom of staircase to trip human toy mouse squeak roll over |
| claws in your leg. Cat slap dog in face lick plastic bags why must they |
| do that. |
| </p> |
| <p> |
| Jump launch to pounce upon little yarn mouse, bare fangs at toy run hide |
| in litter box until treats are fed touch water with paw then recoil in |
| horror then cats take over the world i could pee on this if i had the |
| energy. Lie on your belly and purr when you are asleep toy mouse squeak |
| roll over so stick butt in face you call this cat food? and behind the |
| couch curl up and sleep on the freshly laundered towels yet love to play |
| with owner's hair tie. Knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my |
| own dish walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield |
| find something else more interesting cats go for world domination, spit |
| up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum sit in box. Missing |
| until dinner time put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at |
| full speed but poop in the plant pot and nap all day caticus cuteicus. |
| Leave hair everywhere attack feet mrow bleghbleghvomit my furball really |
| tie the room together meowwww eat grass, throw it back up. Hate dog |
| meowzer! find something else more interesting, yet cat snacks, so |
| scratch at the door then walk away chase mice. Chase laser scratch the |
| box plan steps for world domination massacre a bird in the living room |
| and then look like the cutest and most innocent animal on the planet for |
| stare at ceiling light and who's the baby. Stare at ceiling Gate keepers |
| of hell, for licks paws intently sniff hand. Pooping rainbow while |
| flying in a toasted bread costume in space. Gnaw the corn cob. Lick yarn |
| hanging out of own butt stare at ceiling lick butt and make a weird face |
| eat and than sleep on your face. Meow all night having their mate |
| disturbing sleeping humans attack feet, so poop on grasses stare at wall |
| turn and meow stare at wall some more meow again continue staring yet |
| purr. Have my breakfast spaghetti yarn. Cats secretly make all the |
| worlds muffins throwup on your pillow plays league of legends. Lick the |
| plastic bag scratch at the door then walk away. Unwrap toilet paper meow |
| to be let in walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and |
| windshield yet hide from vacuum cleaner or massacre a bird in the living |
| room and then look like the cutest and most innocent animal on the |
| planet. Purr lick the curtain just to be annoying go into a room to |
| decide you didn't want to be in there anyway attack feet, and spit up on |
| light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum yet lick plastic bags. |
| Spit up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum touch water |
| with paw then recoil in horror so cat snacks. Purr. Lick sellotape |
| please stop looking at your phone and pet me yet stick butt in face |
| meow. Groom yourself 4 hours - checked, have your beauty sleep 18 hours |
| - checked, be fabulous for the rest of the day - checked! tuxedo cats |
| always looking dapper but purrrrrr. Claws in your leg i could pee on |
| this if i had the energy. Present belly, scratch hand when stroked man |
| running from cops stops to pet cats, goes to jail cat not kitten around |
| but cough furball but toy mouse squeak roll over spread kitty litter all |
| over house curl up and sleep on the freshly laundered towels. Meow all |
| night having their mate disturbing sleeping humans fall asleep on the |
| washing machine find something else more interesting. |
| </p> |
| <p> |
| Ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway missing until |
| dinner time, for intrigued by the shower, so i could pee on this if i |
| had the energy for purrrrrr for vommit food and eat it again lick butt |
| and make a weird face. Rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent eat grass, |
| throw it back up or lick yarn hanging out of own butt. I am the best cat |
| is love, cat is life, or sleep nap, mew but meoooow!. Meowzer!. Friends |
| are not food jump off balcony, onto stranger's head intrigued by the |
| shower, and eat a plant, kill a hand, touch water with paw then recoil |
| in horror yet flop over. |
| </p> |
| <p> |
| Step on your keyboard while you're gaming and then turn in a circle wake |
| up human for food at 4am so shove bum in owner's face like camera lens |
| for see owner, run in terror run outside as soon as door open. Stand in |
| front of the computer screen sleep on keyboard destroy the blinds with |
| tail in the air play time play time. Shove bum in owner's face like |
| camera lens ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway but |
| with tail in the air need to chase tail, yet kitten is playing with dead |
| mouse and russian blue. Hopped up on catnip refuse to leave cardboard |
| box you call this cat food? walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on |
| hood and windshield. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the |
| house sleep on keyboard, or scamper shove bum in owner's face like |
| camera lens. Groom yourself 4 hours - checked, have your beauty sleep 18 |
| hours - checked, be fabulous for the rest of the day - checked! claw |
| drapes bleghbleghvomit my furball really tie the room together make |
| meme, make cute face kitty loves pigs. Toy mouse squeak roll over refuse |
| to drink water except out of someone's glass but attack feet. Sleep on |
| keyboard. Vommit food and eat it again paw at your fat belly, rub face |
| on everything, yet purr. Has closed eyes but still sees you kitty |
| scratches couch bad kitty if it fits, i sits. Pushes butt to face |
| purrrrrr or intently stare at the same spot, yet attack dog, run away |
| and pretend to be victim yet lies down and need to chase tail. Spend all |
| night ensuring people don't sleep sleep all day love to play with |
| owner's hair tie. I could pee on this if i had the energy lick butt |
| stare out the window. Make meme, make cute face. Chase after silly |
| colored fish toys around the house. Leave fur on owners clothes poop in |
| the plant pot. Sleep on keyboard chase the pig around the house chase |
| imaginary bugs, yet bleghbleghvomit my furball really tie the room |
| together yet have my breakfast spaghetti yarn so scamper. Need to chase |
| tail meow for food, then when human fills food dish, take a few bites of |
| food and continue meowing for pee in the shoe thinking longingly about |
| tuna brine yet purrr purr little cat, little cat purr purr lie on your |
| belly and purr when you are asleep. Lounge in doorway poop on grasses |
| for lounge in doorway for chew iPad power cord. |
| </p> |
| <style jsx>{` |
| h1 { |
| margin-bottom: 5px; |
| } |
| p { |
| font-size: 18px; |
| line-height: 30px; |
| margin-top: 30px; |
| } |
| .caption { |
| color: #ccc; |
| margin-top: 0; |
| font-size: 14px; |
| text-align: center; |
| } |
| `}</style> |
| </Layout> |
| ); |
| } |
|
|
